Let the Unrelenting reign of
Snowstrdamus begin! I’ve finally realized what I am, an entire offseason will
do a lot to a man. It will force you to look at who you really are, life can be
a girl when you can’t drown out that annoying voice in your head with the
destruction of an NFL football game and keg stands. On the other side of that
however, I have realized that thanks to the fact that I have had little to do
with my life other than sit around and think about either how Breaking Bad will
end, or exactly how Miley Cyrus hasn’t offed herself yet, I have had an
epiphany and I have realized that I am nothing other than a whiter, less
magnetic version of Kanye West, and Bowes is essentially Kim Kardashian. I am
the talent of the group, I do all of the heavy lifting, I am the creative voice
of my generation, and for some unknown reason, society thinks Bowes is hot.
Even though we all know, that he is only followed by people because of me, he
still likes to act as if he has done something to deserve his hype, I am his
meal ticket, I am the only reason anyone knows who he is.
as far as sports betting goes, let’s start where it matters, with football.
“Oh, but Snowstradamus, we want to hear about baseball.” Well that’s too bad,
considering the fact that if you came into a sports betting blog expecting there
to be baseball advice you’re probably the same person that tuned into the VMA’s
expecting to see something other than desperation and “over the hill” women
with decades long daddy issues. See there’s something you people don’t
understand about me, I don’t want football season to be here, I need football season to be here. I need
football season like Aaron Hernandez needs to resurrect Jonny Cochran. I need
football because let’s be honest, that’s all we’ve got, in a world of Lindsay
Lohan and Candy Crush football is the shining beacon on the hill, football is
Tom Brady, and the rest of the world is Mark Sanchez. LET’S MAKE SOME
Atlanta +3 I am not jumping on the
Saints train, no way no how. I get it, Sean Peyton is back and Drew Brees is
Drew Brees but you know who doesn’t care? Matt Ryan. Matt Ryan, Osi, Stephen
Jackson and company couldn’t possibly care less about Drew Brees or his “Feel
sorry for me because I paid money to guys who hurt other players” whining
coach. Falcons 33 Saints 30
New England -9 This looks too good
to be true, rookie QB? Tom Brady? A guy who would rather breakdown a third
string offense for a pre-season game than even look at his smoking hot wife
Bill Belichick? The Pats D may be bad, but it won’t be that bad. And let’s be
honest, the only reason anyone even knows who Wes Welker is is because of #12.
He will do just fine with the new guys.
Panthers Seahawks Under 44 ½ The
Seahawks have the best secondary in football, and our offensive line looks
about as strong as wet toilet paper. Russell Wilson will get his yards, but we
have a revamped D-line and one of the strongest linebacking cores in the
league. I’m looking for Cam to really have a massive game, more with his legs
than his arm which will open things up for a few big gain passes. I’m going to
be a homer and say the Panthers will win, but I think getting to 45 will be a
tall task. Panther 24 Seahawks 17
Alright, after another 1-1 week I find myself suspended in
sports betting purgatory. It’s not good, but it’s not bad. This week I’ve got
three picks for you and due to my current condition of being confined to a
couch going on constant soup runs and feeling like I’ve been run over by a
double decker bus full of Rosie O’donalds, I have made said picks while under
the influence of Nyquil. Be forewarned I drink it straight out of the bottle,
measuring doses is for patsies.
This game is the Alamo for both teams, and the Game is at
Philly. I expect both offenses to struggle, but I think Philly’s defense will
have a few key takeaways and will set up Vick & co. for some easy points.
Philly 24 Dallas 21
Houston/Chicago Over 40
I think the line is lower due to the defenses, more
specifically the public perception of these teams defenses . Both of these QB’s
are elite in my mind and I think the total goes over by at least a touchdown.
Houston -21 Chicago-27
I expect Carson Palmer to have a big game. Well, a big game
by QB standards against the Ravens anyway. I look for him to keep from making
the big mistakes and only take what a notoriously hardnosed and opportunist Ravens
Defense gives him. I think the ravens win, but I like them by no more than a
Well after getting a nice pick for the Pittsburgh game i went an even 2-2 last week. Guess that beats 0-4 or 1-3. Last week is behind us and i got a really good feeling about this week! Im gonna more pumped with juice than the whole tour de france field! Im making a personal guarantee of profit this week so be ready to jump on board. BOL to all
Pick: Panthers/Broncos over 47
Peyton Manning is contending for MVP and Hell he may put up 47 by himself. This Panthers offense still has a lot to prove this year and after getting a win they are getting hungry. I expect some points to fly this week. Peyton will be Peyton and destroy the secondary and Cam Newton will be just the pain in the ass to keep the Panthers around in this game. Broncos- 34 Panthers 24
Everyone is all hype about the bears and that defense has looked impressive , but this is a whole different week. I expect the Bears to contain the Texans compared to normal, but i expect JJ Watt and company to eat Jay Cutler for dinner. Arian Foster and Andre Johnson will be just too much for Chicago to pull this one off. Houston- 24 Chicago -16
Big Bucks NO whammies pick of the week- NYJ +6
The Jets have been a crappy team and the Seahawks are over rated. Seattle is a tough place to play, but Rex Ryan will have his boys ready to play. Jets are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 times following up a loss. Its gonna be a fun one to watch and the Jets may pull this one off if Seattle isnt careful. Seattle 27 NYJ 26
BIG BUCKS NO WHAMMIES!
feedback always appreciated
Yet another winning week last week going 2-1. My partner Snow has been getting destroyed this year. Ill admit hes had a couple decent weeks lately, but still he still in a pop warner league compared to us in the big leagues. imma keep it short and sweet since it seems to be working (yes im superstitious when it comes to sports)
Pick: PIT/NYG under 48
So much turmoil in NY right now because of Sandy. The Steelers have been thrown out of their normal pre-game routines, but they still have a solid defense. Jason Pierre Paul is a man and is going to eat Big Ben alive today. I expect the G-men to come out with a hard fought scrappy win with little points scored. Giants-17 Pit-10
Pick: Bal -3.5
Weeden has been playing pretty well lately and the Ravens defense has been sketch this year due to some killer injuries, but they are coming off a bye week. They have had a plenty of extra time to focus on how they are going to confuse Weeden and how to get pressure on him. I expect the Ravens to roll here! Ravens-30 Browns 13
BIG BUCKS NO WHAMMIES PICK: CAR/WAS over 48
RG3 wants to prove that hes better than Cam Newton has ever been and Cam Newton wants to prove that hes not as bad as his stats look this year. two running qb's against two weaker secondarys . I expect fireworks joe dirt style in this one (the good stuff). Panthers 30 Skins 28
As always BIG BUCKS NO WHAMMIES.
comments and questions always appreciated.
Another day,another 3-0 week for the anointed one. Take a minute to take this all in folks, don't get too excited. This is the type of thing that you want to sit back and enjoy. If anybody sees Bowes tell him to back off the ledge. I know he's considering ending it all. I tried to tell him he never had a shot, but just like the kid that gets picked last for every pick-up basketball game, he's just gotta keep running up and down the court flailing his arms like a mental patient and jacking up airballs while playing defense like a linebacker. Don't worry Bowes, you can be on my team. Think of it as a Rudy moment. Only you're never getting in the game. LET'S MAKE SOME MONEY
Classic Public Fade. The Browns are better than people think. And the Ravens are not what they were five weeks ago.
Ravens 21 Browns 20
Panthers/Redskins Under 48.5
Too much hype surrounding these offenses (even though the Panthers have fallen short this year thus far) and the big name Quarter backs have driven the total up.