This is the worst day of the year on the sports calendar. What the hell am I supposed to bet on, office coin flips?
 
Did you see the Covers.com contests section today? It’s a perfectly illustrates how bare the cupboard is compulsive sports gamblers like myself today.

I feel a mean panic attack coming, like Bill Paxton in the movie Aliens. Game over man! Game over!


I guess I could get a jump start on my three-ball bets for the British Open, or I could take a look at what’s going on in the WNBA. But I need some help. I need survivor bettors. You know like Jedi degenerates who lived through more All-Star breaks than me.

Tell me what you plan on doing today. Are you betting your balls off today or sitting on the sidelines?