Now that Donald Trump’s Affliction, and Kimbo Sli…err, David
Marshall’s EliteXC have crumbled, the only MMA betting game in town
is the Ultimate Fighting Championship. While many wanted to see the
braggadocios UFC president Dana White be usurped by smaller, up and coming
promotions, the balding mastermind seems to have conquered the MMA world.
Despite the dramatics, UFC betting and MMA as a
whole are still in their infancy, and stars are still being born. Just as
professional wrestling and boxing did as they were beginning to appeal to the
masses, MMA has turned to gimmicks - nicknames - in order to market their
fighters individually.
You’d think that since MMA betting is still brand
new in the grand scheme of things, that there’d be plenty of awesome nicknames,
right? Look at early boxing handles - “Manassa Mauler” Jack Dempsey, “Brown Bomber”
Joe Louis - awesome stuff. After all, if you’re just starting out, every
nickname in the world is available to you. However, MMA seems to have missed
the boat when it comes to moniker, producing some of the lousiest epithets in
all of sports.
Let’s all point and laugh at the five worst nicknames in
mixed martial arts…
5. Josh "The
Dentist" Neer
As seen in Kevin Costner’s classic Field of Dreams, there’s not much going on in Iowa, which could
explain why this Des Moines native is so aloof, and thought “The Dentist” would
be a cool nickname. However, if there were television in Iowa, Neer would have
known that dentists aren’t
cool in combat sports. After
embarrassing losses to Mark Miller and Nate Diaz, Neer may need to hire a
personal dentist if he’s going to continue absorbing punishment.
4. Sean "The
Muscle Shark" Sherk
Nobody likes someone that is constantly
making reference to their physique and fitness level, so Sean Sherk lands a
spot on this list. Especially after his little
scandal - Sherk should probably divert fans’ attention from his muscles.
Despite the ridiculous tag, Sherk was favored on UFC odds going
into UFC 90 against Tyson Griffin, and came out on top.
3. Frank
"Twinkle Toes" Trigg
Sure, it’s 2008 and thus a new age of fighters being comfortable
with their own sexuality - but “Twinkle Toes” doesn’t even begin to evoke
fear in opponents.
2. Josh
"Kos" Koscheck
What is this, hockey? Abbreviations and slight variations of
last names have no place in mixed martial arts. I would expect more out of an
educated man from the Edinboro
University of Pennsylvania.
1. Elvis "The King of Rock n'
Rumble" Sinosic
What suspicious
minds came up with this handle? Despite his miserable 8-11 record, Dana
White can’t help but fall
in love with him, and continues to give him chances, despite the fact that
he’s obviously on his way
down. After losses in his last two bouts, he’s looking to make it an American trilogy at
the next Cage Rage event. It’s
now or never for Sinosic, who will soon have time to reconsider (baby) his
career. Maybe he can get some ideas by taking notes of UFC 91
betting odds.