"Number 9, number 9..."

Here are a few 9 o' clockish plays:

1st Half UTEP 0 (-110)

and

Phoenix Coyotes (Yotes!) (-125)

Rock and roll!

2nd Half Chick Picks

Ohio State +7

and

Over 71

Good luck, everyone!

Chick Picks

It sure is great to close out the evening with a few chick picks...instead of a chick flick. However, I did make it through Twilight the other evening...and, revoke my Man Card if you want...but I actually liked the movie!

Anyhow, given the rarity of sports betting on women's events, both collegiate and professional, I am not surprised by how difficult it was to find information about tonight's women's March Madness matchup between the Stanford Cardinals and Ohio State Buckeyes.

I discovered that the majority of women's March Madness pundits have Stanford in their Final Four....But, Ohio State is no Barbie doll opponent, as a look at recent box scores and stats truly supports. Stanford may hold the offensive advantage, but Ohio State plays better than average defense. Also, though the Cardinal seem to have a clear home court advantage. a few strange, unsettling factoids nearly negate that element.

Thus, here's what I've got:

1st Half -- Ohio State +6.5

1st Half -- Over 62

Game -- Ohio State +12.5

The game is televised on ESPN2. Make sure you choose the HD channel, for, yes, yes, a few of these talented athletes are smoking hot!

Digger Phelps: Sherlock Clueless

Did anyone catch Digger Phelps' pre-tourney pick sketch on ESPN?

It was certainly clever, Phelps as some sort of detective trying to pick the winner of the collegiate basketball championship. The piece culminated with Digger choosing the Pittsburgh Panthers to win it all.

His brief role as a dick (slang for detective) makes even more sense now!

'Nova/Pitt 2nd Half Plays

Here we go you lovable yet despicable gamblers:

Villanova +0.5

and

Over 75

Just remember, win or lose, at least you're playing!

Thank you, Mr. Taylor.

...for missing that layup in the closing seconds of the Missouri/UConn game. With one weak flick of your wrist you earned millions of UConn bettors loads of cash...and crashed more than a few books.

Pardon my frank way of expression, but, dude, I haven't witnessed such limp wristed behavior since PBS news showed highlights of the Rainbow Coalition gay pride parade.

Thanks again, Mr. Taylor!

I got my Over 151, but, more importantly, I got the UConn cover!

Miley Cyrus Sings...And Gambles!

[Acoustic guitar...strumming slowly.]

I love Jesus, my mother, my father....

I love fame, fortune, and the Jonas Brothers....

But when I can escape from the media landscape...

[Acoustic guitar...racing...chaotic.]

I go to Vegas, and I bet on everything!
I go to Vegas, and Billy Ray buys me drinks!
I go to Vegas, and Barkley gives me tips!
I go to Vegas, screw the tabloid risk!

Hannah, I mean, Ms. Miley Cyrus, completely endorses the following March Madness picks:

1st Half Missouri +3.5

Missouri/UConn Over 151

UConn -6

She adds that if you don't take your kids to see her new movie you might as well burn in hell.

Happy gambling, everyone!

MLB Early Plays

I may be as crazy as Mr. Blonde in Reservoir Dogs, but I plunked down a few units on the following dogs:

Florida Marlins +119

and

Baltimore Orioles +126

Win or lose, Mr. Blonde is the shiznit. "Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy?" Great character. Great scene. Greater movie.

Rock and roll, fellow degenerates!

2nd Half Big Green Turd Plays

The Jerkhawks have just about pushed me to the point of...

...betting in their favor.

But one should always have faith in their plays, unless said faith requires anything positive from the Syracuse Orange.

Here are my 2nd half Kansas/Michigan State plays:

Over 74 (-115)

and

Michigan State -3 (+110)

Hey, Bill Self, eat a hot, hairy, big green Spartan turd!

Hey books! Here comes a big green turd!

1st Half Michigan State -0.5

and

Michigan State 0

Rotten Oranges

Syracuse is arguably the worst Sweet 16 team EVER!

Somebody please give me reason to apply empathy.

Mizz/Memphis 2nd Half Plays

Over 78 (-110)

and

Missouri +7 (-105)

Good luck, everyone! 

Mizz/Memphis 2nd Half Leans

After what I have witnessed thus far...

I like Missouri and the Over.

*But if the totals line is over 90, I'll probably go Under.

Thoughts?

The Dullest Thread O' Picks Ever

After a full day of soul sucking tasks, I simply have no creative energy.

Here are my Sweet 16 plays...thus far:

1st Half - UConn -3.5 (-125)

Duke ML -140

3-team 4 point Teaser
Missouri +9
UConn -3.5
Pittsburgh -3

Good luck, everyone!

MLB Over Parlay

I parlayed the following over plays...

Red Sox@Reds Over 9.5
Astros@Cardinals Over 8.5

Runs!  Runs!  Runs!

Penn St/Florida 2nd Half

Penn St +7

and...

Over 73.5

*Unless Penn State's shooting goes cold, they should cover the number.  Florida should hit a higher percentage of shots in the 2nd half.  I like a close game and late free throws to get me the over this time. 

Rock and roll!

Penn St/Florida 1st Half Plays

Penn State +6

and...

Over 65

Good luck, ladies and degenerates!

Thanks, AJ...

I just want to thank AJ and all MLB Preseason Profiteers.

By tailing AJ and others yesterday, I turned a hefty profit...even though my offshore on-line didn't have MLB available until nearly 11:00 a.m. CST. 

Keep up the good work, everyone!

Apart from the Angels, Orioles, and later the Cubs, here are a few other early plays:

NY Mets@Houston Over 9.5 (-110)

Phillies@Blue Jays Over 10 (+100)

MC Bet's March Madness Musing

March Madness is here and I'm crazy to win!
Tonight's card is sweet, so let me begin:

I like Portland State (+6) to cover the first half,
and check out yet another must have....

The Eagles are ready to soar again,
as BC (+115) slays the mighty Trojans.

And if those picks don't really please ya',
peep this 7-team 4-point teaser:

Louisville -18.5
Utah +2.5
Boston College +6.5
Portland State +15
Wake Forest -3.5
Michigan State -12.5
Florida State +1

May all your picks be slam dunks!

Miss St vs Washington: The Bite of the Bulldogs

Mississippi State +6 (-110)

Mississippi State +230

Under 149.5

*Each play is two units.

Hopefully at least two of the above three plays are barking up the money tree!

Rock and roll, fellow degenerates!

MC Bet's Cuba Rap

If you're deep sea diving get some gear called "scuba,"
but if you bet World Baseball it's gotta be Cuba.

Cuba +100 (2 units)

Venezuela +125: Not today, USA!

Two units on Venezuela!

Translation Please

How do you say, "Don't score any runs," in both Japanese and Korean.  Because after Puerto Rico got apple pies to the face by the USA, I'd really like to scream Asian directives at the top of my lungs!

In other words, I have under 7.5 runs in the Japan vs Korea game.

Puerto Rico +160: Traitor...Or Just Plain Dumb

I know it's the USA and all...and baseball is America's pastime...and how in a near Orwellian (1984) society I should be worried that my anti-American bet gets noticed by the Feds, or a thousand raging Rush Limbaugh fans...but I simply don't think the USA squad will win.

Furthermore, whether I am labeled a traitor or stupid, I'd feel much more ignorant betting the USA and watching the game in full mode-American -- red, white, and blue pajamas, nachos, hot dogs, Budweiser long neck beers, etc. -- for a Ford Festiva value of -190 (USA line).

Win or lose, my fellow Americans, let's play ball!

"Ill Noise" by MC Bet

It's the 20th anniversary of Paul's Boutique,
and Purdue is about to scalp The Chief.

A Boilermaker is also a drink, so
slam one down 'cuz Illinois stinks.

So all Purdue bettors put your hands in the air.
Illinois is missing a player...
but I just don't care.

MC Bet's Monday Microphone Check

Yo, I better check myself before I wreck myself,
for the weekend almost robbed me blind.
Niagara's Purple Eagles and Japan's world team
kicked me squarely in the behind.

But today is the start of another work week,
another chance to start a winning streak.
So forget rapping about gutless losers,
tonight I'm all over...

The College Of Charleston Cougars (-2.5)

Happy wagering, everyone!

Portland +4 First Half Thread

I know that Super Patty is back, but I'm playing...

1H Portland +4 (-105)

...anyway.  The Gaels have not played for a week, plus I foresee a bit of difficulty suddenly inserting Mills into a lineup that has done better than expected without him.

Also, even though Mills was out of the lineup for both meetings this year, Portland led at the half.

Be cool.  Stay in school.

Falling Into Niagara

I'm leaning towards...

Niagara -8

and/or

Over 147.5

Niagara needs to win this conference tournament to even have the slightest chance to make March Madness.  But more than that, they most likely want to avenge a 90-87 away loss to Rider on February 18.  Niagara has won four straight games by at least an eight point margin, including the recent conference tournament beat down of Marist by 29 points.  Rider has won five straight games, but outside of the 90-87 home upset of Niagara the victories are rather unimpressive.

I'd appreciate any thoughts, insights...or even random babbling.

Rock and roll, degenerate dames and dudes!

China vs South Korea In-Game Thread

Wake up you sorry SOB's!

I have South Korea -3.5 (-125)...

and

Under 9.5 (-115).

Rock and roll!

Sunrise WBC: "Oh, it's Godzilla!"

We are less than one hour removed from the start of China vs Korea, and you must ask yourself 1) Why in the Babe F*$&ing Ruth am I awake? 2) What am I playing? 3) What are the odds on Godzilla crashing the game and torching the players?

Here's what I've got:

Korea -3.5 (-125)

and

Under 9.5 (-115)

Take care and fuel up for a dynamite Sunday!

Open Letter To Football Fans/Bettors

Soccer is and always will be a beautiful game.

I have spent nearly three years watching and/or betting on soccer.  Honestly, it did not take long to understand why worldwide soccer is the most popular sport.

However, I am tirelessly puzzled by all the missed goals in the average professional soccer game.  Shots miss wide left.  Shots miss wide right.  Shots fly over the goalie and crossbar.  Even the corner kick is quite often misguided.

I understand the soccer ball can be difficult to control.  A few times my misdirected backyard kicks nearly resulted in a broken window.  Plus, I have never had to face any professional soccer opposition that might alter the direction of my kicks.

Footballers, similar to NFL football players, are paid exorbitant amounts of money.  However, in the soccer world the "stars" rarely produce goals each and every match.  Imagine new Buffalo Bill, Terrell Owens without a touchdown after two or three games.

It is not challenging for me to understand the general drought of goals in most National Hockey League games, for the net is considerably smaller and the puck is often traveling at the speed of the average Major League fastball.

Yet I am continuously perplexed by the lack of goals in the average professional soccer game.

And increased goal scoring is a must for the beautiful game to gain popularity amongst today's televised sports audience. 

<... [More]

Online Sportsbook MLB Problem

My online sportsbook is not offering today's MLB card.  Sure they may be adjusting the lines, but it never takes this long.  Anyone else have the same trouble?

Wednesday's EPL Plays

Straight Wagers (2 Units each)
Stoke City 0 (-130)
Tottenham Over 2.5 (+110)
Wigan -0.5 (+105)

2-Team Parlay (1.5 Units)
Aston Villa 0 (-115)
Everton 0 (-115)

May we all profit from the pitch!

MC Bet's Dallas Maverick Bailout Rap

Mark Cuban, you owe me dawg,
and every degenerate betting slob.
Losing to the Thunder had me crying,
and now I hope you get struck by lightning!
But that's just a metaphorical threat,
truth is the Mavs have lost my bet.
The only thing that will make my day
is a full refund of my Dallas play.

P.S.  I'll accept a few financial success secrets.

P.S.S.  But that doesn't mean I'll ever bet on your team again.  Really, Mark, the University of Connecticut women's basketball team could beat this year's Mavericks.  Word to your mutha!

Itch for the Pitch

First of all, many thanks to Covers members p_66, Flyers, lutz, icemantbi, calinreddog, savagethug54, and everyone else who regularly contributes to the Soccer forum.  Your information and insight has been incredibly spot on when betting on the beautiful game. 

It's truly a shame that 1) most American sports fans have difficulty enjoying soccer, and 2) many American sports bettors avoid wagering on soccer.  Unlike the often ridiculous lines and juice of more popular sports like NFL football and NBA basketball, the typical soccer match seems to always have one or more profitable sides or angles.

Here are my English Premier League plays for today:

Portsmouth +1 (-130)

West Bromwich Over 2.5 (-115)

Portsmouth Over 2.5 (+100) (*Smaller unit play...just a hunch.)

3-Team Parlay
Portsmouth +1 (-130)
West Bromwich +1 (-130)
Liverpool Under 2.5 (-145)


Thanks again all Soccer forum faithful, and may all your pitch plays turn a profit!

MC Bet's Monday Microphone Check

The first Monday of March and Madness on the way,
loads of college games and the NBA.

The word "tease" has ill connotations...
misbehaving kids and shorties faking relations.

The "teaser" in gambling gets no respect,
most players call it a "sucker bet."

But tonight I hope to multiply my dough,
as long as the following teams show:

4 pt Basketball Teaser
Villanova +7
The Citadel -2
Mavericks -2

May all your picks be slam dunks,
but if you lose it's not a slump.
Even Charles Barkley loses bets...
and sometimes drives off drunk.